8 Bedtime Routine Saboteurs! (& How to Fight Them)
By now you likely know that babies, toddlers, and big kids thrive on routineāand bedtime routines are no different. But sometimes the habits or behaviors weāve baked into our childās bedtime routine actually work against our ultimate goal ofĀ sleep. If youāre dealing with bedtime struggles, middle-of-the-night wakeups, or otherwise not-great kid-sleep, it may be time to rethink your childās bedtime routine. Keep reading to learn if youāve fallen prey to some of the most common bedtime routine mistakes parents inadvertently makingā¦and how to fix them.
Lack of Consistency
A routine is not a routine if thereās no consistency! So, if your childās bedtime continuallyĀ fluctuates, if youāre regularly skipping bath or stories to fast-forward tuck-in, or if you take turns with your partner putting you bub to bed, but neglect to sync up your strategies, thereās is no āroutineā in your childās bedtime routine. The result: Your little one is left confused about what to expect every night, which hampers comfort and sleep.
The solution, of course, is to set up a clear andĀ consistent bedtime routineĀ that features a predictable sequence of events every night. Doing so builds trust and comfortāand brings the ZZZs. In fact, parents of 7- to 36-month-olds who adopted a predictable and calming three-step bedtime routine that included aĀ nightly bath, massage, and quiet cuddling or singing saw their childrenĀ fall asleep faster, sleep longerāand they were less likely to call out to their parents than when the routine wasnāt in place.
Sneaky Light Sources
A childās bedroom that appears comfy, cozy, and perfect for sleep might actually harbor a big sleep saboteurs: light. When light peaks into your childās sleep space, it can keep theirĀ brain on alertĀ and disrupt their natural circadian rhythm, which relies on light and dark cues to help them sleep and wake up. To figure out if your little oneās room is secretly working against their need for ZZZs, lay in yourĀ childās bedĀ one night with the lights off and look around. Is light from a streetlamp sneaking in? What about from under the door? Is there an abandoned iPad on the dresser? How bright or dim is their nightlight? Afterward, figure out if you need to make the following tweaks:
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Put up blackout curtains.
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Turn the hallway light off.
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Keep all electronics out of your childās room.
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Use a dim, adjustableĀ nightlightĀ that glows a sleep-inducing orange or red, likeĀ SNOObie.
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Place your childās nightlight out of their direct line of sight, perhaps partially blocked by furniture.
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Ā Finally, donāt forget to dim all the lights about an hour before bedtime, too!
Stimulating Pre-Bedtime Activity
Itās important to engage in only calming, quiet play and activities before lights out. That means no roughhousing or playing with light-up or noisy toys before bed! Make sure yourĀ bedtime storiesĀ are lighthearted and reassuring, too. Some spot-on activities to consider adding into your childās bedtime routine include:
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Meditate together. (Use SNOObie andĀ this guideĀ to teach your totĀ Magic Breathing.)
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Read a personalisedĀ Beddy-Bye book.
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Give a warm bath.
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Offer aĀ massage.
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Do some light stretching.
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Listen to anĀ audiobookĀ or kid-friendlyĀ podcast.
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Complete some easy puzzles.
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Colour some pictures.
Opting for Silence
SinceĀ white noiseĀ (aka Shushing) is an integral part of theĀ 5 SāsĀ for soothing babies, parents might think white noise is only important for baby sleepā¦but thatās untrue!Ā White noise can helpĀ everyoneĀ get the rest they need. Once you start using white noise in the background during your little oneās bedtime routine, theyāll start to expect it and make the connection that white noise means sleepytime is here.Ā White noise also creates a āblanket of soundāĀ that masks sudden shifts in sound consistency, like a dog barking or a noisy truck passing by, that can wake up kids (and grownups). Finally, white noise even helps to distract children from some commonĀ internalĀ sleep-sappers, likeĀ teething painĀ or a slightly stuffy nose. Essentially, white noise gives your tot something else to pay attention to, which can then help lull them to sleep. (SNOObearĀ andĀ SNOObieĀ both offer the very same paediatrician-designed white noise as theĀ award-winning SNOO.)
Screentime Before Bed
No matter if youāre a child chilling to an episode ofĀ Paw PatrolĀ or a grownupĀ scrolling Instagram, electronics stimulate the brain, delay/hinder REM sleep, and hamper the release of the sleepytime hormone, melatonin. And because childrenās eyes are not yet fully developed, researchers believe that theyāreĀ even more sensitiveĀ to the impact of light on the internal body clock than adults. Thatās why theĀ American Academy of PediatricsĀ recommends absolutely no screens 60 minutes before bedtimeāand limiting all screentime to an hour or less for tots between 2 and 5 years old. Still, other experts encourage capping screens 90 minutes prior to bedtime, noting that before bed screen time has aĀ āstrong, negative effect on sleep quantity and quality.ā
Skipping a Lovey
Research shows thatĀ only about 10% of familiesĀ offer their children a lovey as a sleepytime companion. Paediatrician Dr. Harvey Karp speculates that parents may resist loveys because they worry their little one will become dependent. āParents who turn their backs on loveys are missing a huge opportunity!ā says Dr. Karp. āThese cuddly friends are a wonderful sleep aid, they help babies and toddlers build confidence and security, and they work wonders for easing separation anxiety.ā Theyāre especially comforting amid times of stress, like during travel, as well. (Even theĀ AAP notes that loveys help childrenĀ make the emotional transition from dependence to independence.) Hereās how to make a lovey part of your totās bedtime routine:
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You can start to introduce a lovey to your little one at aroundĀ 6 months old.
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Before handing the lovey over to your child, wear or hold the lovey for at least an hour so that it holds your soothing scent. Do this for about a week.
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Bring the lovey on walks, cuddle with it during storytime, have it on the changing table, and more so your tot begins to recognise it and connect it with comfort and security. (If you opt forĀ SNOObearĀ as your totās lovey, know that you not only get a lovey, but a responsive white noise machine and a silly puppet that kids adore. Plus, you can strap it to your pram.)
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Once your child isĀ 12 months old, go ahead and let them sleep with their comforting friend for all naps and nights.
Wrong Temperature
Did you know that thereās an ideal temperature for sleep? And if your childās room is warmer or cooler than that temperature, their sleep can very easily run amuck? Itās true! When youāre turning on your bubās white noise machine and settling in for storytime, take a gander at the thermostat, ensuring that itās between 68 to 72 degrees Fahrenheit, which is the sweet spot for slumber, notes Dr. Karp. At the same time, dress your child in pyjamas, bodysuits, or sleep sacks made of breathable cottonānot sweaty synthetics, like fleece, that can causeĀ overheating. If youāre able,Ā consider organic cotton, which is consideredĀ more breathableĀ than regular cotton.
Skimping on Sweet Talk
Bedtime can be frustrating for parents, for sure. But if you let that frustration come out as youāre leaving your childās room, disaster can ensue! To help ensure a sweet good-bye, try what Dr. Karp callsĀ bedtime sweet talk. āRight before your little one drifts off to sleep, their mind is wide open and ready for your loving words,ā says Dr. Karp. āSo, take the opportunity to fill your tykeās sleepy mind with gratitude for all the wonderful things they did that day. This will nurture their sense of optimism about all the things they may do and experience tomorrow.ā Hereās how to do it, according to Dr. Karp, bestselling author ofĀ The Happiest Toddler on the Block:
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Once your child is tucked in, snuggle up close.
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With a mild, non-excited tone, recount some of your bubās fun experiences and acts of kindness from the day.
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Ā Calmly talk about tomorrow and list a few things that might happenāand good deeds your love bug may accomplish. (I wouldnāt be surprised if you climbed all the way to the top of the monkey bars tomorrow! You might even get to help your teacher collect papers again!)
Toddler bedtime sweet talk makes bedtime something your child looks forward to...instead of something to avoid! Plus, itās a huge confidence boost that helps your child drift off with a full heart and wake up the next morning ready for anything! Finally, bedtime sweet talk is a wonderful way to build bonding into your child's bedtime routine, to boot!
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REFERENCES
- Science Daily:Ā Bedtime Routine Improves Sleep In Infants And Toddlers, Maternal Mood
- Cleveland Clinic:Ā Why Light at Night Can Interfere With Your Sleep
- Digital Media and Sleep in Childhood and Adolescence.Ā Pediatrics.Ā November 2017
- Media and Young Minds.Ā ļ»æPediatrics.Ā November 2016
- Tufts Medical Center:Ā Screen Time: How Much Is Too Much?
- Use of Sleep Aids During the First Year of Life.Ā Pediatrics.Ā January 2006Ā
- American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP):Ā Transitional Objects: Security Blankets & Beyond
- Sleep Foundation: Best Organic Sheets
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